I knew it was all pre-planned, but I justcould not put it all together until later. At first I let them convinceme because I saw it was what they thought was best for me and somethingthey felt I must do. Then, I just couldn't take it because I just didnot understand. All those I trusted and loved were telling me I was nota real person, that I was for the most part always a girl. My body wasmore girl than boy and even my manliness was deformed and useless forall its intended purposes. The real shock came to me when it was soeasy for them to make me appear as a girl. I knew that it would takemore than that to make me appear as a man. That is when I lost it. I nolonger knew who I was or even what I was. I went within and almoststayed there."Helen began to softly cry then, probably she was remembering when Angelhad gone within for months locking out the world."With Marjorie's help and the others intervention I did snap out of it.I now know that there is no escape that way. It is a. Kick Josh out and then call me.?I could hear her breathing but she didn?t talk for a very long minute.?Kelli this is what I meant the other day. Baby you seem so strong andso powerful when it comes to work. You are totally fearless. Yet whenit comes to us you are a complete coward, you won?t even try.??I don?t know how many times I have to say it, but I will try again. IAM NOT INTO MEN!??Baby Josh told me that when he kissed you that you were into it asmuch as he was. He felt there was real chemistry between you. So whatchanged???I have told you, Josh was just an experiment. Yes I kissed him, butthat?s all we did.??Did you enjoy the kiss??I didn?t want to answer this because I knew she wouldn?t be able toleave it alone. ?Yes Lauren I enjoyed the kiss, but I realised that itwasn?t what I wanted.?She giggled. ?Did you get hard? Did it excite you??Now it was my turn to hold the phone unspeaking. I sighed. ?Yes LaurenI enjoyed it and yes it excited me.??If that?s the case baby what is.
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